One thing I’ve noticed in life is that you become who you hang out with. Especially with family. It’s funny because I don’t think we realize just how much we are like our family until we are in a situation where our family is near our friends or someone else close to us and we are interacting.
In those moments you get the insight that shows you how molded you’ve become to your families desires and who they are and not your own free will / desire. This can be good or bad depending on how much you like or resist your family, lol.
But seriously, there is so much subliminal communication going on between you and your family it’s silly. And you don’t realize this until you are able to get away from them for a while and look back and go holy shit, I didn’t realize how much of an effect they were having on me until I left.
I find that it’s when you leave that you take control and responsibility for your life, naturally. And not in a way where you are forced or told you “have to” do certain things and become a certain way. It is simply because you are smart enough to realize that although your family is protecting you from danger, they are hindering your growth by keeping you too sheltered. You realize, “yes, everything you say is true, take care of yourself, help others, get a job, pay bills, I get it.” But at the same time you are choosing to create these things in your life because you just genuinely want to. Not because you “have” to, as if it were expected.
Now when you are out of this family bubble, you will probably feel a lot less stress. There are no demands on you saying “you have to pull your weight, you have to get a car, a job, what are you going to do!?!?!?” “Think! Think! Think! Think!” REACT.
It gets old dude. Like really old. I think at this stage of the game we are all smart enough to realize what and who we want to become, and to act responsibly and not cause harm to others. We don’t have to live in our parents shadows of fear. Instead we can create ourselves to be the light we always wanted to see.
The reason why parents keep you so sheltered is because of fear. It is their fear they that don’t believe they will be able to handle if something were to happen to you. Although I accept this, I believe it stifles growth unfortunately.
One thing I learned about nature is that nature will actually cause you pain if you are not careful. If you rush and are in a hurry not paying attention, you could brush up against a spiky tree branch and get scratched without you realizing it, and it will hurt!. Pain will happen in life, even in the most comforted safe spaces.
But I think it’s when you are on your own and forced to either nut up or shut up is when you wake up and go holy shit. NO, this is what I want for my life. NOT what YOU want. but what I want. And I don’t have to explain myself anymore. THIS IS WHO I AM. I am going to take control and be the man I want to!